Hello dear readers, and welcome to the revitalised Final Town Cryer, covering recent events of the Juin-Juilat period in the northernmost town in all of Civil Anderon! I reintroduce myself, Sharon Stormcaller, reputed reporter and jaunty journalist back to print after a brief hiatus to bring you all the recent news and up to date events so that you, yes you, can know what's what in Final Town! All, for the low low price of 10 Copper Pieces! Now, isn't that an offer worth taking?
A gang of rowdy troublemaking bandits has finally been given the boot by a band of local mercenaries hired by Crown Covenant Captain Fenne Lightmoon. "The Red Finger Gang", named so because they dyed their index fingers red during their initiation, has made their last raid, decimated by the valiant efforts of Unnamed Adventuring Company. Brought low by the arrows of Meep, the javelin of Mortis, the druidcraft of Cully, and the cunning of an unidentified roguish gentleman- the gang was reduced to a single man, now held prisoner in Final Town Law Office to be put to trial for his many crimes. Your intrepid reporter was able to snatch an word with the last surviving member of the now thoroughly defunct gang, who is quoted as saying "You can't just turn into a bloody bear, that's cheating!"
Perhaps, dear readers, it is cheating, but all's fair out in The Lost North. A lesson the Red Finger Gang will have learned perhaps a little too late.
A small child was rescued from a certain grisly end thanks to the quick thinking and bravery of the esteemed Viscount Nustlebury, who, while engaged in exploratory exploits, happened across the young boy being pursued by a pack of vicious goblins. Due to his quick thinking bravery, the young wizard's apprentice, who had gotten himself lost while running an errand, was quickly saved from the goblins by his honourable Viscount, accompanied by his manservant Mr Brooks.
When asked for comment Nustlebury provided the following statement: "Yes, I spotted the lad during my expedition, and thanks to my lightning fast reflexes myself and Mr Brooks were able to defeat those vulgar goblins by blade and by shot. No innocent blood shall be spilled under my watch! I then escorted the boy back to his home in Final Town, comforting him and ensuring safe passage."
Mr Brooks was also asked for comment, and had this to say: "That's how it happened, yes."
Appr. Bolzark was approached for comment on the matter, but we were instead accosted by his Master, local wizard Alumnite Strange. Pressed for his own opinion, he simply stated: "Young Jarmy was fine I'm sure. Back when I were a lad going out and fetching herbs when told was normal as fleas on cats. These young lot are getting too soft and I'll bet he learned a valuable lesson out there. Now vacate my porch."
The Cryer commends the bravery of Viscount Nustlebury and wishes him all the best in his future exploits, of which we look forward to hearing!
Local businessman Dylan Barchost recently became acquainted with his family inheritance - an entire mining complex out in The Lost North! Bluepond Mine was abandoned several years ago under mysterious circumstances, but this local entrepreneur is determined to bring it back in service. A purveyor of vegetables by trade, Barchost is hoping to branch out into mining, revitalising local industry and leveraging the great heritage of Anderon's rich mineral reserves- and likely generating several jobs for Final Town residents in the process! When asked his what his wildest dreams were for Bluepond Mine, he had this to say: "My wildest dreams? I suppose I'd like to find a ruby as big as my award winning cabbages. They're really big."
Strange spectral lights have been spotted at night over Weaver Woods, with some saying they can see ghostly apparitions gliding through the air. Could these be hauntings from the restless dead, ill omens of witchcraft, or signs of foul dark necromancy? We invited a local expert on the matter to speculate, Corwyn Derek is a popular local "Spirit Hunter" known for his engagements with the "phantasmically estranged" as he describes them, here's his take on the events:
"Well, Sharon, and thanks for bringing me in today Sharon, I really appreciate it. What I can see is a broad cacophony of spirits within and above Weaver Woods. They're crying out for help, is what they are. Crying out in terrible pain. 'O, trapped within this forest labyrinth, how ever am I to pass on!' When they go up above the canopy that's them trying to leave, you see. I've been in this business for years now Sharon, and I've seen some real things, stuff that would turn your aunt green. Oh, it's terrible the sorrow of these spirits, but all the way out there they can't be helped. There must have been some terrible tragedy in those woods. You know why they call them Weaver Woods of course? Because the foliage is so dense it forms a thick wall, like this!" At this point Mr Derek put his hands together, fingers interlaced. "And then nothing can get in or out! Oh goodness me Sharon it's terrible, and I can hear them wailing away, I can only imagine what's happened to stir them up now."
When pressed for more details on what may have indeed happened to "stir them up" Derek shook his head, and solemnly refused to speak any more on the matter, taking a handkerchief to wipe a single tear from his eye. Truly moving stuff.
Have you witnessed the Spectres of Weaver Woods? Write in with your comments on the matter and you may be featured in the next issue of The Final Town Cryer!
"Trees so tall Some trees small With bark and leaves Like dog is trees" -Tya Numen, 5
Treasure Hunt - by Lord William Saftlesantle Follow my writing, get loot without fighting!
"Betwixt a pool of ultramarine And gentle cool forest of green Stone hideaway beside a path Amara and Vail - you do the math"
"Searching for the whereabouts/remains of Thomas Gront. Enquire behind Last Stop bar."
"Has anyone seen my glasses? Please hand them into the watch if you do, thank you dear - Mrs. Doris Tumblor."
"Looking for muscle. Serious profits. No time wasters. Big job out north. Enquire - Blackspire."
"Need spider hunters. Don't get nosy. Leave a message with Pigeon Box 32 if interested."
Firbolg Druid, Adventurer, Team Player. Tragically drowned, 09/07/50. Gibbish is remembered by his comrades of Unnamed Adventuring Company. "He smelled funny but he seemed alright"- Jarmy Bolzark, Wizard's Apprentice "Bastard left us with a tab a mile long," Danstar Fren, Proprietor of The Last Stop "He was blue, and now so am I", Dolmire Lampton, comrade of the fallen. "Wha-blblblblblblb," inferred last words via witness testimony.
Human Warrior, Adventurer, Lone Wolf. Missing presumed dead as of 01/07/50 He leaves behind a dog, Professor Paws, which is now in the custody of The Clan Detachment. "Thomas always paid what he owed, good lad," Danstar Fren, Proprietor of The Last Stop "For two things you could count on Thomas. To do his best, and to not know his limits." Cannar of Clan Redaxian, Head of The Clan Detachment.
Goblin. Dead. Dear reader, we received an obituary posting by mail, but regrettably it appears to be written in Goblinoid and we were unable to provide a translation before time of printing. As best we can make out, this is for a local goblin who fell in battle. We shall endeavour to provide more detail in future.
The Sprintball has been cancelled on account of waterlogged pitch.